


Some Comfort for the Sam Girls

by thinkinghardhardlythinking



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-21
Updated: 2020-09-21
Packaged: 2021-03-07 20:08:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26583406
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thinkinghardhardlythinking/pseuds/thinkinghardhardlythinking
Summary: Trying to process my feelings about the end of the show, I wrote this fluffy/angsty story about Sam.
Relationships: Sam Winchester/Reader, Sam Winchester/You
Kudos: 11





	Some Comfort for the Sam Girls

It wasn’t surprising that when you tucked yourself into Sam, your head in the crook of his neck, his strong arms around you, you felt safe. It was your favourite thing in the world.

“I’m here. I’ve got you. You’re safe.” He’d whisper so softly into your ear. And you felt it. He’d close his eyes and breathe you in and stroke your hair and damn, if in that moment it didn’t feel like every bad thing in the world fell away.

But now, now that he was far away and the boys had gone off to fight Chuck - God - and Death! Talk about picking your battles. You didn’t know how it would end or what would happen to them. It hurt. And all you wanted was to feel safe, like that, again.

He’d video called earlier and you’d tried to be brave, but Sam was the smartest, kindest man you’d ever known and he could see through your bravado easily.

“Talk to me Y/N, please.” He’d said, gently, and he’d done the puppy dog eyes thing. You smiled despite yourself, even though it was a smile through sadness.

“I just….I don’t know what’s going to happen to you guys. You’ve been everything to me for so long now and I don’t want anything bad to happen to you… and…. I don’t want to say goodbye. Usually I’m there with you on the hunt, in the crappy motel room, listening to you guys bitch and moan at each other in Dean’s baby…”

He had smiled at that.

“I get why I’m not there, I’m not complaining. I just love you and I hate that this might play out in a way where….you’re gone. Forever.”

He listened, the way he always did and looked at you through the screen, so earnestly.

“I know baby, I get it. It sucks. The not knowing, the goodbye, all of it. Hey, do you remember when I told you about when Dean and I went to heaven, a while back?”

You nodded.

“Do you remember when I told you that it was memories? Just memories, of times, from our lives?”

You nodded again.

“Y/N, I don’t know what’s going to happen but I know that memories are important, they are literally what heaven is made of, and I think we made some really good ones. The drives, the hunts, the motel rooms…Oh God, do you remember the ‘Disco’ motel room…” He laughed.

“Oh, how could I ever forget….”

“The first night in the bunker, the other nights….” he trailed off. You knew the nights he was talking about. The nights where he’d fixed you with the look that started off tender but led somewhere hotter, somewhere urgent. Sam was loving and sweet but he was also sexy and manly and when he went from one to the other, it left you breathless.

“I remember,” you said, smiling despite yourself, “I remember all of that. I remember you, Sam Winchester.”

“And I remember you. I remember all those times you were there with us. And I remember thinking that you wouldn’t have found us and stayed with us all those years if you weren’t just like us…and how was it you described us?”

“Strong and brave and pains in the asses?”

“Right back atchya.” He smiled like sunshine and winked into the camera and made things better, like he always did.

“Sam, you and Dean are facing God knows what and it’s got to be so hard. I don’t want you to have to be giving me a pep talk for fucks sake….”

“It’s not a pep talk. I’m just telling you how it is. I know we’re in your memories, you are definitely in mine,” It made your heart swell, hearing him say that, “I don’t know what’s going to happen but I do know that goodbyes aren’t always forever and that if we aren’t together it’ll be so, so hard but I know you, Y/N, I know how strong you are, how you always keep fighting, it always makes me so proud and that’s what you’ll do, you’ll keep making me proud wherever I am, whatever happens. And we really do have some great memories; researching in the bunker with you distracting me all the time, watching movies at Bobby’s, the backseat of the Chevy…” He paused, giving you a smile that made you shiver, his dimples deepened as his eyes flashed with a sexy swagger that was reserved only for you “I’ll always want to be there, with you, having you freak out about how small your hands look next to mine, talking all night long, defending me when Dean starts in on that whole clown thing….putting my hands in your hair and looking into your eyes just before I kiss you….mmmm…..do you remember that night….just outside South Dakota….’

There had been many nights outside just South Dakota. But you still knew the one he meant. For a moment you were both silent, just remembering.

He cleared his throat. “My point is I’ll always want to be there with you, baby. And it’s tough…all of this. But when I’m not there, if I’m not there, I know you’ll be strong and you’ll remember all the times I was with you and you’ll remember my voice telling you that you got this and I love you and…’ he trailed off, he was so typically Sam, brave and caring for everyone he loved but this was hard on him too.

“I love you too. You are the kindest, bravest, smartest, sexiest man, I have ever known. And knowing you has been the best part of…” your voice faltered. Nope. You didn’t want this to be how it went, they were heading off tomorrow to find Chuck and you didn’t know what might happen, you weren’t leaving it this way. “Anyway, if you say ‘we’ll always have Lebanon, Kansas’…I’m going to throw my phone against the wall…” You forced yourself to laugh. For him.

“Oh God, don’t do that. Hey…you still have those videos on your phone, and the pictures?”

“The ones you and Dean were always giving me shit about taking? Of us, just goofing around and stuff? Yep, I have them. I have a lot actually…”

“Watch them. All the time. Remember all the fun times we’ve had, hell, the bad ones too…”

“We’ve definitely had ‘times’….”

Off screen, there was the noise of Dean coming into the room and mumbling something about needing to go do something or other.

“OK, just give me a minute.’ Sam said, his gaze away from the screen.

“Y/N?” Dean asked Sam.

“Yeah, you want to say something?”

“No, we said our goodbyes before.” came Deans voice, “Don’t forget what I said, Y/N!”

“Yep, you are a candle in the wind, Dean…” you said laughing, “…and you’re going to kick it in the ass.”

“We love you.” He hollered “You take care of yourself, kiddo!”

You heard the door shut and Sam was looking at you again with those eyes that you loved so much.

“This is so hard,” you said, “I’m just never going to be ready to say goodbye to you.”

“So don’t. I can’t say goodbye to you either,” his eyes were welling up now but he smiled so wide, if that wasn’t a trademark Sam mood, sensitive but brave, you didn’t know what was. He rallied himself, knowing he had to go. “Look, sweetheart, treasure everything up to this point, relive it all the time, wherever I am, I’ll be thinking of you, everything ends but also it never really does, know how proud you make me and how much I love you and know you’re safe and I’m always with you and….”

“Sam…Sam…stop. You mean everything to me. You have done for years. I’ll be sad but at least I met you and knew you and laughed with you and just, all of it. I’ll think of you all the time. But just….thank you. For everything, for making my sad times less sad, for being with me all this time, for letting me share your crazy stories, being so goddamn hot…” He laughed at that. “…for saving the world. You are some hero, Sam Winchester, you’ve always been mine.”

He looked at you, intently. You were both crying but not desperately, just because it mattered and you both felt it so deeply. For a moment, you just looked at each other, a current of all the things you both wanted to say but didn’t have the words for, passing silently between you until he cleared his throat and wiped his tears away. He smiled, gently and kindly.

“I’ll see you again.” He said, kissing his fingers and touching the screen.

You nodded, as if to say, that you knew, that it was ok, that whatever happened you knew this would be true.

“I love you, my brave, wonderful Sam.” You said

“Love you too, my brave, beautiful Y/N/N.”

And then he’d gone. That had been this morning and since then you’d cried a lot and rewatched videos on your phone, some from years ago. It was all sad, there was no getting away from it, but when you thought of how much the Winchester boys had brought to your life, it staggered you slightly. So, it hurt but you’d be strong, just like they’d want you to, like Sam wanted you to. You hoped hard with everything that you had that they would be ok.

You loved them both, you always would. And yeah, you wanted nothing more than to feel Sam’s strong arms, pulling you in, keeping you safe, feeling him near you, keeping the badness at bay. But for now, you watched a video that Garth had taken and sent you years ago, of Sam with his arms around you. You were both unaware of being filmed and he was smiling as you looked up at him, gazing lovingly into your eyes and kissing you gently on the forehead….you knew no matter how anything ended, in the end everything became a memory, and Sam was the best part of so many of yours. He’d helped you be strong all those years, you weren’t going to let him down now. You’d keep loving him, you’d keep fighting, you’d keep him with you, however you could. Always.


End file.
